You’ve Got Tea or Sense and Sensitivity

           

While I spent much of my time flat on my back this week fighting the flu, I did what I usually don’t do when I’m well— I watched TV and movies.  I imagine you do the same. What’s in your repertoire of flicks for a bad day? My cabinet houses: Persuasion, Pride and Prejudice (two versions), and Sense and Sensibility (two different ones as well).  I’m not restricted to Jane Austen; there are a few others I’m fond of like You’ve Got Mail, Sleepless in Seattle, and While You Were Sleeping. They’re all sugary love stories.

Although I haven’t seen if for years, I watched American Idol while recuperating. It was interesting to watch all the talented young people sing their hearts out about love. And I couldn’t help but wonder how much any of them knew at this stage of their lives. Little, I suppose. And it’s not their fault. I knew little when I was their age.

As the hours crawled by, I was reminded again about what love is—not from my sappy movies or the belted-out songs sung on a Hollywood stage. The definition of love came in the form of cups of tea that came up to the bedside, pain reliever delivered upon request, words of kindness extended to a crabby, sick person who looked crabby and sick. Love came in the form of:  “What can I get for you?” “You’re my Sweetie.”  “I’ll cancel that engagement for us.” I’ll move my things to the other room so I won’t wake you when I get ready for work.”

My hero of the tea

My husband would say that he is and has been far from perfect. Our marriage would be found to have had many mistakes and rough times. But it’s been built, on both sides, with service, commitment, and forgiveness. My husband isn’t likely to walk across a misty field to talk with me because he couldn’t get me out of his mind all night, but he’s wonderfully predictable about placing a cup of hot tea on my beside each morning so that when I get out of the shower, it’s waiting for me. I know which I prefer!

Recently a young woman told me she had no idea what a marriage should look like. She hadn’t been able to learn that from her nuclear family. It is my hope that she will begin to observe godly couples and hear the words of Scripture that will help her build a healthy model for a strong marriage.

One less-sugary watch this week was Fireproof. It’s one of my all-time favorites, even though it’s very different from all the others. Did you ever notice that in most movie romances after the guy gets the girl, the movie quickly ends? Why is that? I contend that it’s because that’s only the beginning of all the challenging work that goes into making a marriage strong and lasting. Fireproof gives a snapshot of the work it takes to rekindle and keep the flame of marriage alive.

Love takes work, lots and lots of work, day in and day out. In sickness and in health, even when your spouse is crabby and sick. So sugary movies are fine for sick days.  But on regular days, I recommend picking up love’s tool kit and working to build.

And one more thing: Thanks to my husband for all the tea this week and all the thousands of cups of tea and kindness that preceded them!