A Faded Impression

           As the wind howls and the snow blows sideways today, the day after Christmas, I’m home on vacation where I plan to stay warm and toasty. Yesterday was one of best family holiday gatherings we’ve had in years, and I’m so grateful to God for the day and the time we had together. Against a backdrop of more difficult times in the past, my husband and I thanked God for the wonderful day and will cherish yesterday’s memories for a long time.

            While I’ll embrace this Christmas in my heart, I’m not one who likes Christmas all year. No, I like Christmas at Christmas. So last night I asked my husband when he thought we should take down the tree and get the house back to normal.

When I go back to work, my work station will also reflect that aspect of my personality. By the time I left on Friday, my Christmas stockings were stored away for next year, Christmas cards packed to bring home, and my 2013 calendars tacked up. I want to look forward, not backwards when I go to work on January 2.

In my clean-up process I took a hard look at some of the things that decorate my work space, including my Monet. I’ve hung The Poppy Field in my work station for years.  The bright red poppies grab my attention, and I continue to be intrigued by the impressionistic style. So the cheery print of the ladies walking through the fields has been my touch of culture and escape in my business world.

The Poppy Field after a slow fade.

Lately, as I’ve looked critically at the print, I’ve noticed that the ladies blend into the grass. The poppies aren’t vibrant. When I held the frame away from the fluorescent light that illuminates the field, I realized that everything in the print had grayed. It never seemed like it on Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday of any given week, but if I were to have compared it to what it had looked like on December 21, 2008, I think I would have been surprised how the color had drained from the print. The daily fade had been unnoticeable.

The Poppy Field before a flow fade.

I can’t get away from that thought because I bring it into the spiritual realm. How much have I done a slow fade in my life as a Christian?  Where have I gotten gray instead of remaining bright in hope, faith, and steadfastness? Where does my life fail to line up with the mission of Christ? Where am I not like him? I want to keep asking those questions into the new year.  In fact, I always want to be asking those a questions. The Old Testament is replete with examples of people who started well but didn’t end life well in their service and reflection of godliness. Just like my Monet, they faded.

Solomon faded away into marriages with pagan wives. Saul faded away into jealousy. Jonah faded into sympathy for a plant rather than brokenness over lost people. The fade seems to have happened when their lives changed from being God-focused to self-focused. I’m still adjusting to the fact that life isn’t about me. It’s about God. I want it to be about me, but when I make it my way, I’m not happy for long.  When I get the correct perspective again, life changes for me.

Are you asking the same questions I am? Let me know what you think about fading away.

Therefore, my beloved brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. (I Corinthians 15:58, NIV)